September 3rd, 2008 “The Battle”

The church put on a benefit dinner for us last week, initiated and headed up by my brother-in-law, Gregg and sister-in-law, Cori. It was so wonderful. Over 350 people showed up. People I hadn’t seen for years. Even some guys I used to party with in high school were there. I had hoped that my brother and sister would be there but they did not make it.

Branden and myself got to share. I think my “4th son” (my Timothy) did a marvelous job. One man, that we know of, came to Christ. God’s word never goes void.

Enough money was raised that night to send us, as a family, to Israel. WOW! Thank the Lord for the body of Christ. We also were able to give to others out of that.

Now, we are on our way to Seattle to the ALS center and hope to get to a few questions answered. Like, “Do they know the progression of this in my body type?” Or, the medications that might help…new research…my prognosis…how long until I won’t be able to take myself to the bathroom…when I can no longer go on my own. I have questions about the the saliva issues, quinine and also the bladder issue, social security, etc..

My arms ache. The tremors are getting worse.

We will head for Israel the day we get back. Very excited. My family is so special to me.

Read Jeremiah 31, “The Lord will turn mourning into dancing. There is hope for the future, declares the Lord…”. Without hope we can’t even live. You can live 40 days or more without food, 8 days without water, 8 minutes without air but not one second without hope. Jesus, You are my only hope. Heaven is my hope. Salvation through Christ is my hope. One day my whole family will be in heaven, that is my hope. This Israel trip is my hope of lasting memories with my family. A cure or God’s healing is my hope.

My hope is that all my grandkids will come to know Jesus Christ and serve Him with all their hearts and souls.

I had a dream last night that I was on my death bed and the family was there. I could hear them but I didn’t open my eyes. There were all at a distance. It was too vivid for me. Wow! I am ready to go “home”. I have been preparing for that day for a long time now but I’v stepped it up, some. I wonder why : ). Not that I am being morbid about it or consumed by it. It is just reality.

I still want God to heal me but sometimes I wonder if He wants me healed….’there is a sickness that leads to death (1 John 5) but there is also a sickness for healing…to the glory of God. I am praying for that one.

…..flying home from Seattle…we just flew over Mt. Rainier. Wow! It is awesome! God is so incredible. This is just earth – wait till we get to heaven!

Sept. 4, 2008
We are back from Seattle. Very expensive trip to hear the same news…that I have ALS. The doctor was very nice and very apologetic that there hasn’t been much done to help ALS patients. I knew that, too.

I did get a kind of time line from when I first noticed I was getting weaker to where I am now. I think it was either January or February of 2007. Then, in March, 2008 Mike Tweedy mentioned that the “twitching” in my right tri-cep was weird. I had been noticing it for about 3 weeks to a month before that but from that time on it became more and more noticeable.

One of the things the neurologist told me was that I have a certain amount of energy everyday. It won’t restore itself like in other people. So, I need to pace myself, he said, because I can’t “bank” it. Can’t overdo it. That’s hard for me.

2 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Kandi L. Sprague
    Mar 21, 2013 @ 14:31:38

    I love you Cliff, see you soon, Kandi



  2. Honey Goodman
    Mar 22, 2013 @ 17:08:56

    I love reading his words. I can hear is voice. Thanks for sharing Wendy.



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